YUFFIE x RENO COLLECTION
by Satan's Sweeties
Summary: Indefinite as of now collection of Yuffie/Reno oneshots and ficlets. Highest rating will be T, rated for innuendos and Reno. HIATUS
1. Blackmail

I couldn't have asked for better blackmail material, considering I normally couldn't get this close to the redheaded asshole currently, and most likely unknowingly, earning me YouTube fame. Oh Lord, Reno'll kill me if and when he finds out, but _God_, it'll be worth it and more; for I, the Great Ninja Yuffie, have scored the pleasure of spotting Reno of the Turks doing a pretty good (if I do say so myself) impression of a one Angus Young: stripping and all (not that that's a bad thing).

I don't even remember what prompted me to swing by his room, considering he _really_ doesn't like me all that much. It might have been the fact that I could hear 'Highway to Hell' blasting from outside or maybe Fate just had something to do with it. Naturally, being a ninja trained in the art of stealthy approach, I snuck my merry way up to the Turk's room, leading me into a near bout of laughter that probably would've given me away. Never in my life did I expect to see Mr. Tall Pale Currently Shirtless and Hot playing the air guitar and rocking out to a band named after differing electrical currents.

Choosing the most opportune moment, I slunk off to Cloud's room to swipe his camera, because I didn't have mine and I hadn't yet filled my thievery quota for the day. Needless to say, when Spiky came up a few minutes later, his reaction was definitely what I had expected; a 'Damn! She took my friggin' camera!' was totally in order. I switched the camera to its video capture mode and hit the record button, and just in time too because the next song was starting. I _literally_ had to shove my mouth into my jacket to stifle my giggles, Lord knows what would've happened had he heard me, oh **shit**. I vaguely wondered if he was going to sing along until he actually did, and his singing voice actually wasn't that bad.

To tell the truth, yes, I did feel like a bit of a creeper, but no, it didn't stop me at all. I'm a thief: I don't really have morals anymore. Granted I don't like killing or hurting people, but on average scruples are not the thing that ghost over my mind most often.

_In the beginning_

_Back in nineteen fifty-five_

_Man didn't know 'bout a rock n' roll show_

_And all that jive_

Oh sweet Jesus Christ, Savior and Lord, this was golden.

_The white man had the smoltz_

_The black man had the blues_

_No one knew what they was gonna do_

_But Tchaikovsky had the news _

_He said—_

_"Let there be light," and there was light_

_"Let there be sound," and there was sound_

_"Let there be drums," and there was drums_

_"Let there be guitar," and there was guitar_

_"Let there be rock," and there was roll_

If I'd have died right then and there, I would've died a happy woman. All the materia in the world couldn't have made me more ecstatic than I was at that moment, regardless of how priceless it was.

I smirked as he finished the song, admiring my handiwork. Of everything that could have possibly flown through my mind at that time, I only had one thought as I grinned like a guilty idiot.

_I'm __**so**__ going to Hell._

* * *

It had to be the best goddamn blackmail ever, yo. Who knew that Kisaragi enjoyed singing and dancing in her undergarments? I mean, fuck, I've heard of as well as seen girls that do the whole 'hairbrush popstar' thing, but this was definitely a first. And damn, she looked fine too, if I might add.

Who does Stickyfingers choose to listen to? Lady fuckin' Gaga, yo. Not that I had a problem with it, I just expected her to listen to something like Hannah What'sherface or some shit like that. But hot damn, if she'd dance like that for me, she could use her poker face on me all throughout our bad romance.

I pulled out my camcorder to capture that damn brilliant event. If I wanted to embarrass her, I had to have proof, yo. And proof it certainly was. I wasn't able to stay too long, mostly because my mind kept wanderin' into the playing field of 'I wonder what she'd look like naked'.

Let's just say I needed a few cold showers, yo.


	2. Tucked In

It's times like this that make me wanna rethink my shithole of a life, maybe make some changes, do some shit differently, blah blah blah. For starters, when I was a sixteen-year-old bastard, I—

No. No, no, fucking no. I'm not going to go into some goddamn memoir or something along those lines, yo. Although I've apparently been reminded how much I hate dressing nicely. I would even go so far as to climb up on some godforsaken mountain and scream to the heavens that I fucking hate being clean-pressed and orderly. So why then was I standing in my room wearing a hell-sent pair of dress pants, a clean white shirt, _and_ a tie (A FUCKING TIE, DAMMIT)?

Because I don't wanna be castrated by a big-ass ninja star, that's why.

Oh, and my girlfriend/fiancée is making me meet her parents.

Y'know, when she said yes, I expected we'd run off to somewhere nice like Gongaga and get hitched, honeymoon, have kids, and live a nice happy life together. But, of fucking course, Stickyfingers _has_ to go all 'traditional' on my sorry ass and drag me off to ask permission from her father to marry her. Damn messed up, yo. I love her n' all, but seriously?!

Needless to say, that lead to me standing in front of a mirror and checking myself out, all while damning the people that invented starch. Yes, checking myself out without a second thought, contentedly oblivious to my surroundings—

—well, at least until a pair of hands reached inside my pants.

"Holy fucking shit on a goddamn stick!" I shouted as I tensed up from shock. I snatched the offending limbs out of my 'no-no' zone and whipped around, face flushing considerably.

I did NOT blush. I was just…frustrated, yo. Yeah. We'll go with that.

I came face-to-face with the girl I was planning to marry, big brown doe eyes sparkling mischievously. She smiled at me. _She fucking smiled at me_. After molesting me (not that I'm objecting), all she does is fucking _**smile**_ at me?! "What the hell, Princess?"

"Your shirt wasn't tucked in," she answered, hands clasped behind her back, acting as if shoving her hands into my freaking private areas was as normal as chatting about the weather. I felt like ripping my hair out.

"You could've just told me like a normal, sane person!" I scree—hollered. I'm a man. Men don't screech. "Yuffie, I love you and all, but you don't have to be so…physical."

Jailbait wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me into a hug. It was nice; just the two of us in a room bathed in sunlight. I felt her squirming around in the embrace, but I did nothing to break the contact. "Reno, could you loosen your grip a tad?"

I raised an eyebrow, both eyes still closed. "Why?"

"I can't reach the scissors in my pocket." Shock. Horror. Fear. Ohholyshit. I snapped my eyes open, pushing away as I stared wide-eyed at the love of my life.

"No." I was adamant. "Fuck no."

"I _have_ to. You look too rebellious." Really? No, that's not what I was going for at all—insert eye roll here. "You have to make a good impression on Daddy, so quit being a royal pain in the ass!"

Oh God. The Point of No Return, yo; Baby-girl was pissed. I gave in, untying my ponytail and hanging my head in shame. "I hate you, you know that?" I spat bitterly, repressing a shudder as she began snipping the first few strands.

"I love you too." Girl code for 'I own your soul, bitch'. As soon as she finished she put the scissors back into her pocket and ran her nimble fingers through my hair, stopping when she came to the now-short hairs on the nape of my neck. She wrapped her arms around me from the back, nuzzling her face into the space between my shoulder blades and sighing contently. "I like it better short."

"Whatever," I grumbled, still freaking miffed at the fact that she cut off my ponytail. Y'know how long I'd been working on that? Ten years! I practically dragged her out to my helicopter as I snatched the suitcases by the door, tossing them unceremoniously into the back of the chopper.

It didn't take too damn long to get to Wutai. I could tell her folks liked me right away, seeing as her dad came out to shake my hand, and pretty enthusiastically, too. After a small meet n' greet we sat down and had dinner. I figured that was the best time to pop the question.

I cleared my throat before I began. "Mr. Kisaragi?" I asked, trying oh so damn hard not to seem like a wimp. He acknowledged me with a 'hm' and I continued. "Sir, I was wondering if I could have your daughter's hand in marriage, yo." _C'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon…_

He spluttered. Mrs. Kisaragi squealed. I shit you not.

"W—well, I suppose so," he stammered, wiping up a bit of the water he had just used for a fabulous spit-take. "I don't see why not. You have my blessing."

"Thank you, sir," I said sincerely, felling as though a ten ton block had been lifted off my heart. I turned towards my now-confirmed fiancée and smirked. "Hear that, Stickyfingers? We're official."

She hugged me tight, her grin never leaving her face. "Kick-ass!"

The game board was set up.

The pieces were arranged.

The timer was started.

And dammit, we were in it to win it.

* * *

"I still don't see how you guys are together after all these years," my daughter drawled, flipping her dark brown hair behind her shoulder. "You guys are so different."

"That's what makes it work, babe," I mused, running a hand through my short red hair. Yeah, fifteen years later and I still kept it short. "God, you look like your mother."

She raised an eyebrow at me and smirked. Looks like she did get a lot from me too. "Daddy, you've told me that every day for the past sixteen years."

"And I will continue to tell you that every day until I die," I stated, pulling her into my arms. I kissed the top of her head before I let her go. "Now, I believe that a certain girl's boyfriend is in the kitchen waiting for me?"

"Don't go too hard on him Daddy, okay?" I nodded and she gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving the room. I stood up, stretching myself out and walking towards the opening to the kitchen, only to be assaulted by the woman I love—

—who currently had her hands down my pants.

"Holy fucking shit on a goddamn stick!" I yelled, grabbing her hands and spinning around to meet her grinning face. Why the hell was she sexing me up with company over? "What the hell, Princess?"

"Your shirt wasn't tucked in." I laughed for a moment before swooping down to meet her lips.


	3. Different

All Yuffie had ever wanted was a sweet boy to love her for who she was. She made that goal at twelve and ten years later she still hadn't found the right one. But she wasn't going to quit until she found him, no matter how long it took.

That led to her resorting to kissing nearly every one of her male friends and party members.

Cloud was cute. Just one innocent little kiss had him nearly fire-engine red and burning with embarrassment. She frowned and walked away.

Leon had just scowled at her, no reaction at all. She sighed and walked away, defeated.

Sora had become so flustered and scattered that he couldn't think straight.

Riku just sat there in bewilderment.

Vincent showed no emotion, as always.

Cid just spouted something about the 'goddamn kids these days'.

Rude scared her too much.

Rufus just blinked slowly.

Tseng scoffed and turned away.

Quickly running out of options, she planted one on Reno, expecting him to respond in a similar manner as the others.

But Reno was different.

Why?

_Reno kissed back._


	4. Drunk

In short, I was _amazed_ at how hammered one person could possibly get. How on earth did someone as small as Yuffie hold that much alcohol? She was a pretty funny drunk, though; she always told over-exaggerated stories of the kinds of adventures we had gone on, refusing to stop even if told to. Tonight she just seemed a little too crazy.

I glanced over at Riku with one eyebrow raised and smirked nervously as he chuckled quietly. It seemed that we were both thinking the same things about our ninja friend, who was currently trying (and failing) to stand up. She staggered over towards some redheaded guy on the opposite side of the bar, tripping and falling until he caught her, face inches away from his lap.

"Next time," Riku started, stirring the straw around his glass of Coke, "we're going to a bar that has a limit."

"Definitely," I agreed, watching as the redhead helped Yuffie stand up. "D'ya know who he is?"

His gaze followed my finger as I pointed at the man I was talking about. "No, I don't think so," he answered, one hand on his chin. "Should I?"

"I dunno," I said, shrugging my shoulders and taking a sip of my root beer. I jabbed at the ice left at the bottom of the glass with my straw, still watching the pair. "I just thought, you know, what the hell. Maybe you knew him, or something."

"Eh." He finished his drink, leaving a ten-spot on the counter before walking out the door. "I'm headin' back to the hotel. Are you comin'?"

"Yeah," I replied, picking myself up off the barstool and following him. Once we were outside, I struck up a conversation, albeit a short one. "You think we should've left Yuffie with that stranger while she's drunk?"

"I'm sure she can handle herself," he said confidently, hands shoved into his pants pockets as we walked.

"But she's drunk, so her morality is compromised right now," I retorted, kicking a rock with my sneaker and watching as it skidded away. "What if that guy takes advantage of her?"

"Kairi, you worry too much," he stated, wrapping one arm around my shoulders.

_Yeah, well someone's got to._

* * *

"You're sooooooooooooooo strong, Renooo…" she drawled, absolutely giddy from her alcohol intake. Goddamn, how much did she have to drink? She couldn't even fucking stand up straight, let alone carry on an intelligent conversation. I smacked my forehead with my hand and dragged it slowly down my face, stopping right over my mouth.

"Yuffie, you're drunk off your ass, yo," I said, teeth clenched uncomfortably. I turned toward the counter and waited impatiently for my damn beer to arrive and sure enough, Tifa slid me a bottle. I didn't even get it up to my mouth before Stickyfingers opened hers.

"I think you're reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally pretty, Renoooooooo." I fucking choked. Still holding onto my beer, I turned in my seat to face her, drunken smile and all. I'm damn sure I felt my eye twitch.

"…I'm getting you home," I growled, grabbing her hand and dragging her towards the door. "Now." She kept complaining that she didn't wanna leave, pouting while whining and being a stubborn ass. I made the mistake of asking her why, and needless to say her reason surprised the hell out of me.

"'Cause I like you," she said before attacking my mouth. Being the gentleman I am, I kissed her back, seeing as it was the only proper thing to do. Not to say that I didn't enjoy it, yo, 'cause I most certainly fucking did.

I've had my share of kisses in my life but _damn, _could that babe kiss. She was all lips and teeth and tongue and wet and warm and ohmyfuckinggod. I could've died I was so goddamn happy, and I prob'ly would've had she not pulled away. I noticed the lack of an alcoholic aftertaste.

"Yuffie," I stated in a monotone voice.

"Yes?" she chirped, grinning like an idiot. _So fucking cute… _

"You didn't have anything to drink, did you?"

She threw her arms up in the air in mock defeat, smirking at me. "Oh damn," she sighed overdramatically, "I've been found out. Oh well. See ya!" I watched her as she left, swinging her hips flirtatiously. I realized something then.

I was smitten. I was in love with Yuffie Kisaragi, yo. A sexy ass thief that stole my heart—

I remembered that I hadn't paid for the beer I never got to drink, and reached into my pocket for some cash.

—and my wallet.


	5. We should get married!

"Whassat?" a small redheaded boy asked, sticking his thumb back in his mouth. He used his free hand to point at the bundle of blankets in his mother's arms, standing on his tiptoes in a vain attempt to see. His mother laughed, bending down to let her son look. When he saw what she had been holding, his face shone with astonishment. "'S a baby!"

"Yes Reno," she smiled, watching as the three-year-old stuck his finger towards the baby. She grabbed onto it and giggled, causing the boy to laugh as well. Grinning at his innocence, she pressed a kiss to his head and placed the baby into her crib, covering her with the blanket.

"Wusser name?" Reno asked, staring at her from between the bars of the crib. His mother placed her hand on top of his head, ruffling his spiky hair.

"Her name is Yuffie," she said, still smiling softly, "and she's the new girl next door."

Reno's face positively lit up, a shining beacon to anyone. "She's gon be next door? Wif the…Kee-suh-rah-gees?" he sounded out, smiling at his mother after he finished. She nodded, and he turned back to Yuffie. "We gon be best fwends, 'kay mama?"

"Sure thing sweetie," his mother answered, leaving the room quietly. "Make sure not to be too loud, dear."

"'Kay mama!" He smiled at the sleeping infant, feeling elated beyond belief. "Hear dat, Yuffie? We gon be the bestest fwends ever. Jus' you wait…"

* * *

"Reno!" five-year-old Yuffie Kisaragi exclaimed as she ran towards the redhead, embracing him in a hug. She let him go, still holding onto his hands and grinning as she looked him in the eyes, stormy blue meeting brown. "Where were you? I missed you lots!"

"Sorry Princess," he apologized, and she smiled at the nickname that only he could call her. "I was at a wedding. One of my mama's friends was getting married."

Yuffie cocked her head to the side, looking at her best friend with a funny expression. "Married?" she asked, trying out the word on her tongue. "What's that?"

The eight-year-old scratched his head in thought, crimson spikes blowing in the slight breeze. "Huh," he breathed. "Well, my mama said that when two people really really like each other, they make a promise to stay with each other forever." Yuffie nodded her head, mouth open a small amount as she continued to listen to Reno, hanging on his every word. "They go to a church, and then a guy says all this stuff about being nice to the other person. Then they both say that they will, and they kiss and then they're married."

The young girl's face lit up, eyes shining in the sunlight. "Hey! I really really like you, and you really really like me! We should get married!" She clasped her hands behind her back, arching her back and standing on her tiptoes.

Reno nodded spastically in agreement, grinning widely. "You're right! We should!" he stated, grabbing her hand and leading her towards his house. "Let's go tell my mama that we're gonna get married!" He burst through the door, eager to tell his mother the good news. "Mama! Mama!"

His mother entered the room, mixing batter in a bowl and covered in flour. "What is it sweetie?" she asked, looking at her son with a questioning look.

"Me n' Yuffie are gonna get married!" She laughed.

* * *

"So, what'd you think?" seventeen-year-old Reno Sinclair asked, stuffing a handful of popcorn into his face as he walked. He turned his head to look at his best friend, wanting her opinion. She took a sip from her soda, smiling contentedly.

"I liked it," Yuffie said, "and that battle at the end was freaking epic." Reno laughed at that. If there was one thing the fourteen-year-old could do that almost no one else could, it was making him laugh by being so blunt. "Thanks for taking me, Red. I love spending time with you, but we don't get ta hang out that much anymore."

Reno smirked as he took her by the hand, heading toward the park. "Let's change that."

For hours, they did nothing but spend time with each other, swinging, running around, sliding, swinging on the monkey bars. As they began to tire, they set back out towards their homes, laughing and smiling the whole way home. Though it was right next to his, Reno still walked Yuffie to her front doorstep. Before she went inside, Yuffie turned around.

"Hey, Reno?" she asked, receiving a 'hm' in reply. "Can I try something?"

"Uh, sure," he said, wondering to himself why she felt the need to ask his permission.

She leaned in, pressing her lips softly to his, eyes closed. He took a moment to respond, wrapping his arms around to place his hands on her back, and she placed her arms around his neck. Getting lost in each other, they paid no mind to anything outside of their own little world, especially other people.

From up in her room, Mrs. Kisaragi watched as her daughter and her best friend – boyfriend? – kissed each other. She smiled knowingly, leaving the window to give the pair their privacy. "Well, it's about time they got together."

* * *

"Congrats on turnin' twenty-one, Yuffie!" a dark brunette told her, passing her a beer. "Since it's your first, it's on the house!"

"Thanks Tifa," Yuffie said, smiling as she took a sip. "Hey, that's not half bad."

"It most certainly is not," Reno said, coming up behind her and wrapping his arms around her neck, kissing her lightly on the cheek. "Sorry I'm late, babe. I had to pick up your present." He flicked one of her earrings, a pair of dangling diamonds he had gotten her for her last birthday. "I know how much you love the shiny and glittery, so I had to get you the best I could find."

Yuffie giggled, spinning on her barstool to face her boyfriend. "I don't deserve you, you know that?" she told him, flicking his nose playfully. "Well, since you're here now, that means that the festivities can officially begin!"

Her friends each presented their presents, wishing her a happy birthday after she gave them each a hug. Cloud and Tifa had gotten her a new shuriken, Leon had gotten her materia so she'd stop taking his, Vincent and Aerith had pooled their money to get her an ATV, Cid had gotten her the new CD from her favorite band, and Barrett and the kids had gotten her a new necklace. After her friends were done, Reno tapped her on the shoulder to catch her attention.

"Haven't given you mine yet," he smirked, pulling out a small box. He got down on one knee, opening the box and revealing a spectacular diamond engagement ring. "Hey, Princess. I really really like you. We should get married."

Yuffie smiled, tears of joy running down her face. "I really really like you, too. And I promise to always be nice to you. Of course I'll marry you!"

Amidst the cheers and clapping of their friends, Yuffie shot forward to kiss Reno, never wanting the moment to end. In the background, Cloud reluctantly dropped a twenty dollar bill into Tifa's waiting hand. She grinned smugly at him as she deposited the bill into her bra and placed her hand on hip. "I _told_ you he would."


	6. Love Letter

**Author's Note: **Okay, I know I usually don't write notes like this, but I felt that this was important enough to.

Just to let you all know, I am on a serious Reno/Yuffie high right now, so expect this story to update often. Like, really often. Continuing from how it's been, the POV of the stories will change with every installment: some from Yuffie's, some from Reno's, some from another characters', and some from third person. None of these stories tie into each other, meaning each one is like a different universe.

I do appreciate the reviews, and if anyone has something I can do better, go ahead and tell me! I won't bite. If anything, at least tell me whether or not the characters are In Character. Thanks!

* * *

Kisaragi,

I usually don't write letters, so I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. I dunno what prompted me to actually write one, let alone write one to you. I guess, I just had to tell you what was on my mind. Like how I feel about you, mainly, and where we could go from that. I mean, it's not like we see that much of each other, but every time we do get together I'm too chicken—busy to talk to you. I s'pose that's why I wrote this, eh?

'Kay, how do I feel about you? I feel like I'm drowning in an eternal rain when you're not there, and when you are, it's like the sun falls on just you and me. Sappy, right? But it's the truth, unbridled and uncut. I just can't figure out where to get the courage—time to talk to you face to face, and hopefully I will soon before I explode from all this pent-up tension. I dunno what exactly the feeling I have for you is, but I know it's not hatred at all. I just don't know if it's lust or actual…you know…that. God, I sound like such an idiot.

Dunno what I'm s'posed to write now, so I'll just talk about when I first felt for you. I guess it was during the mess with the Remnants. Who in their right mind could possible hate you? I'll admit, your methods are sexy—unorthodox and you're a helluva sparring partner, but I like a challenge. I don't want someone who'll just give in without a fight; I want someone who'll fight me tooth and nail. Someone like you.

Ugh, I'm starting to ramble so I should end this before I say something I'll regret later in life. It feels…good to get this off my chest, though.

—Reno

P.S. I think I'm in love with you.


	7. Pickup games and pickup lines

I _loved _high school. There was so much to do, so many places to go, and so many opportunities. Of course, being the star of the baseball team helped, too. Yep, I was team captain, the best of the best; I could hit, pitch, catch, throw, run my ass off and play shortstop like nobody's business. Talent, they called it, and dammit, I had it. As such, I was predictably the most popular kid in school. And a girl, which meant that there were rules when it came to me and my body, and anyone that broke those rules was threatened with a shuriken to the balls if they ever broke them again. I guess it's pretty self-explanatory about how my love life was.

I was the seventeen-year-old female star of the boys' baseball team, I was smokin' hot, and I didn't take shit from anyone. I was quite comfortable with being single (fewer attachments to hold you back) and planned to stay that way for a long, long time. Or at least until the team got a new member one day.

He was the new kid in school and, from what I had heard, had baseball skills to boot. Naturally, being the competitive ass I am I had to watch him play, so I invited him to come play a pick-up game with me and the rest of the team on that Saturday. I'll admit, he was pretty damn good, but after the game I pretty much lost what little respect I had for him.

"Hey, Yuffie!" he called to me from across the field, motioning with his finger. I jogged over to where he was, my baseball bat in hand still.

"What?" I half-growled, annoyed at the fact that he couldn't get off his lazy ass and come to where I was.

He smirked. "I made you come with one finger. Wanna see what I can do with my whole hand?"

Oh, fuck no. He did NOT just go there.

"Wanna see what I can do with my baseball bat?" I retorted, slapping it against my hand threateningly. I stalked off, leaving a very scared and sexy redhead behind. However, that wasn't the last time he tried.

One day in the lunchroom I was sitting at the table, minding my own fucking business when 'Reno of the Jerks' prances up to me and leans in close, way too close for comfort. I almost went batshit insane on his ass, but my mouth was full of tuna salad and bitch rants don't work when they're muffled.

"Bond," he said with that stupid-ass smirk on his face. "James Bond."

I placed my palm on his forehead, pushing while swallowing my mouthful of tuna. "Lost," I shot back, mouth set in a scowl and eyes narrowed. "Get lost."

He put a hand over his heart, feigning hurt. "That hurt my feelings, yo. Maybe a kiss would make it better?" I picked up my fries and scoffed, getting up to throw my trash away. "Hey, you left something behind!"

"What?"

"Me!" he grinned, leaning on the table. I leaned forward, closer and closer until our noses were almost touching. I smiled sweetly, then shoved my basket of fries in his face, ranch and all. I couldn't just leave right there, so I decided to top it off with a little something…extra; I ran the tip of my tongue along the top of his upper lip, right underneath his nose.

I chuckled quietly, admiring my handiwork as his face burned a brilliant shade of red that led all the way up to his ears. Waltzing off triumphantly, I marveled at my performance and cheered mentally at the thought of the redheaded asshole finally leaving me alone. It wasn't a long lived thought.

He just wouldn't leave me the fuck alone! No matter what I did, said, or how much I insulted him, he just kept coming back! He was like a damn insistent zit! It didn't matter where we were, if he was there and I was too, he'd try to score me.

At the pool:

"Don't swim too close, yo."

"Why not?"

"I might drown in your beauty." I dunked him underwater.

At the park:

"Cute dog."

"Uh, thanks."

"Does it have a phone number?" I slapped him.

In the goddamn lunch line:

"See anything good?"

"No."

"I do." I kicked him in the knee.

At practice:

"How was heaven when you left, yo?"

"Wonderful. You weren't there."

At the grocery store:

"Y'know, I only have three months to live…"

"Thank God."

I do remember one day when Reno decided to try a whole different approach. It was the day before prom and no one had had the balls to ask me to go with them, so I figured that Reno, being Reno, would attempt to anyway. Needless to say, when he walked up to me at my locker I wasn't surprised to see him. It was what came out of his mouth that surprised me.

"I like you. Will you go to prom with me?" I dropped my textbooks I had been holding, sending them to the floor with a loud thunk. I turned to face him, mouth slightly open as I blinked a few times.

"…what?" I whispered, just loud enough for him to hear. He smiled even bigger as he leaned against the lockers.

"I like you, yo," he repeated, accentuating every word to be sure I heard him correctly. "Will you go to prom with me?" I nodded slowly, unable to form words at the moment. "Sweet. I'll pick you up at six."

The next day my mother spent all afternoon fussing over my hair, makeup and nails, which pretty much really fucking annoyed me. By the time six o' clock rolled around, I was fed up and ready to just get to the damn dance. When I answered the door, I assaulted Reno with a kiss, straight on the lips.

"Wow…" he muttered, eyes wide in shock. He quickly recomposed himself and pulled something from behind his back. "I brought flowers, yo." I dragged him off towards his pickup truck before my mother could stop us and take pictures.

We got to the school about five minutes after the dance had started, mainly because there was so much goddamn traffic. I shit you not, there was so much traffic Reno and I had enough time to instigate a very long makeout session. When we burst through the doors, my hand in his, the music stopped and a spotlight was put on us, causing everyone to turn to look.

Someone from the crowd piped up loudly. "Yuffie Kisaragi has a boyfriend?"

The room was quiet for a few moments, nobody making a sound except for the shuffling of feet as I moved closer to Reno. Then suddenly, everyone started cheering and clapping loudly, and the music started up again. We just looked at each other and shrugged, taking the dance floor. Many many many dances and songs later, we snuck off by ourselves as they were getting ready to announce the royalty.

I had my arms wrapped around his neck, and he had his wrapped around my back and waist. I was content with just holding him, off in our own little world with no one else to bother us. I heard the announcements of the royalty: Cloud Strife and Tifa Lockhart, but I didn't care. I had Reno, and that was much, much better.

"Hey, Reno," I started, playing with his ponytail.

"What?"

"Do you have any raisins?" I looked up at him to find him looking very confused.

"No," he answered, shaking his head to reinforce his statement.

I felt the corners of my mouth quirk upwards before I continued. "How about a date?"

"Hmm," he smiled, "how about you, me, plastic seats and stadium hotdogs?"

"Throw in the Yanks and Red Sox and I'm there."

"It's a date."

* * *

"Zack, would you kindly _stand the fuck still?_" I demanded of the black-haired teenager wiggling around like it was going out of style. "You're making this harder than it has to be, puppy."

"Mo-om!" he complained, using that whiny voice that still makes me melt. "I can't help it! I'm nervous! And can you not call me puppy in front of Aerith?" he added, not-so-subtly motioning to the cute brunette girl sitting on the couch giggling.

"And why not, ickle Zacky-kins?" I teased, sticking him lightly with a pin. He flushed a nice shade of pink and I started to laugh. "You blush just like your father did when he was your age." I finished hemming his suit and pulled him into a hug, making his blush grow darker.

As he walked out the front door holding Aerith's hand, I couldn't help but smile. Reno walked into the room, placing his arm around my waist and calling out to our son. "Be safe, yo!" He turned to me, smirking that smirk that reminds why I fell in love with him. "So, we're alone…"

I smirked right back, grabbing a baseball cap and fitting it over my hair. "Yanks versus Boston?" I asked, taking him by the hand and walking over to the trusty pickup truck.

"Yanks versus Boston."


	8. Now I've got you, Reno!

**Author's Note: **Sonic fans, you'll get this joke. If you don't, I'll explain at the end.

* * *

Midnight in Twilight Town looked as expected; it was pretty fucking dark. Except for the glow of the streetlights, the only light came from the moon, though it wasn't exactly the brightest thing ever. Fortunately, it suited the redhead perched on the clock tower just fine.

He looked around, frowning as he scanned the area below. Readjusting his gloves, he descended carefully to a lower level of the tower, closer to the ground. Still searching, he thought out loud to himself, wondering where the hell his target was.

"Where the hell is he?" he demanded, eyes focused on the ground below. "I've got ta find him if I ever wanna be whole, dammit!" Suddenly, a flash of red hair interrupted his vision. "There he is!"

"Now I've got you, Reno!" cried a raven-haired girl, rushing forward to capture 'Reno' in a hug, a serious 'what the fuck' moment for the redhead. "It's about time I finally caught you again!" Opening her eyes and taking a good look at who she had ambushed, she let go of him and stepped back. "Hey! You're not Reno!"

The redhead had the sudden urge to yell 'no shit,' but refrained from doing so when he noticed the girl put her head in one hand and blush, looking at the ground. Before he could say something, he found himself nearly plummeting to his death.

"Um…I'm sorry!" she apologized, pushing on his back and making him stagger forward. She hid her face in both her hands and shook her head violently.

The redhead took in a breath, holding it for a moment. "Ah, I'm…," he started, twisting his head to look back at his target. "Hey, where'd he go?" He shook his head in denial. "He must've run off!" _Dammit! _

The girl walked delicately up to him, big brown eyes wide in apology. "I'm sorry," she said, her tone motherly and genuine. "Did you miss someone because of me?" He looked at her and shook his head, returning his gaze to the street.

"Uh, it's okay," he stated, "I'm sure the guy I'm looking for is still in town." He turned to face her again. "I'm sure I can still find him." _I'd better. _

She shot forward, placing one of his hands between both of hers, smiling at him. "Well then, I'll help you!" she chirped, nodding happily.

"What?" What the fucking hell was this damn girl's problem?

"Two heads are better than one when looking for someone!" she told him, still smiling brightly.

He put his free hand up in defense. "Hey, just wait a second!"

"What's _your_ name?" she asked, cocking her head to the left.

"…Axel," he answered, breaking eye contact with her. She gripped onto his hand tighter.

"That's a nice name," she mused, blinking her doe eyes cutely. "I'm Yuffie Kisaragi." She pointed at her chest proudly. "It's nice to meet you!" she added, pulling him behind her as she walked down the clock tower stairs.

"Ah!" he complained, stumbling over his own boots as Yuffie dragged him along. "Hey, wait!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Okay, so for my non-Sonic fan readers, here's the joke:

In the Sonic the Hedgehog series, Amy Rose is a twelve-year-old pink hedgehog who's absolutely smitten with the hero, Sonic. A running gag in the series is whenever a male hedgehog is spotted, she will proceed to glomp them before realizing that they are, in fact, not Sonic. This scene was from SONIC THE HEDGEHOG for the Xbox 360, a scene in which Amy mistakes Silver for Sonic. Same thing for the Great Ninja Yuffie here; she was out looking for Reno but found Axel instead.


	9. Mistletoe

**Author's Note: **Well, I'm sure you all know the cliché mistletoe story of boy kisses girl, both are embarrassed, then the love is requited at the end.

Right?

Now, throw that all out the window and get ready to see me turn that cliché into something new and fresh, keeping the gist of it all.

* * *

It was two days before Christmas, and Reno couldn't have possibly been more indifferent to the idea of having to buy presents for some ungrateful bastard that didn't deserve his attention, let alone the whole idea of the fucking mistletoe. Seriously, what sex-deprived ass made that up? _Prob'ly some git who just needed a good lay, _Reno thought to himself, chuckling quietly. _Like I need some stupid fucking plant as an excuse to ravish the hottest babe I see. _So, he'd been expecting to avoid the rest of Cloud fucking Strife and his so-called 'buddies' throughout the holidays, he'd been expecting to stay the fuck away from the hanging green plants from hell, and he'd been expecting to just grab a girl and make out with her. Sounded like a plan, but of course it couldn't go as planned; those sorts of things never do.

Bottom line, he hadn't expected the Princess of the Thieves to come bounding towards him and slam him into the doorframe, her lips on his. After it was over and done, she stepped back and grinned at him, shit-eating smile never wavering as he stared at her, right eye twitching slightly. "What the **hell **was that for, yo?" he demanded, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "Who the fuck gave you the right to just up and molest me like that?" Holy shit, she was still fucking smiling! What the hell?!

"Tsk tsk," she teased, waggling her finger cockily. That action alone made Reno want to fucking throw up and/or bang his head against the wall; he chose the latter of the two. She giggled, pointing above the doorframe as Reno's eyes followed her finger, his mouth twisting into a horrified grimace. Mistletoe.

Well, fuck.

The next morning as Reno sat at the table munching his Corn Flakes, he was pretty damn pissed off and glaring at the box as he chewed. As he took his next spoonful of cereal, he continued his ridiculous staring contest with the cardboard antagonist placed neatly in his line of vision. _Prize inside, my ass, _he thought, angrily chewing his near-soggy flakes. His very violent thoughts of doing something unkind to a Mr. Kellogg were interrupted by someone placing their hands on the table and clearing their throat. When Reno looked up, his eyes came in contact with an endless expanse of breast, meaning Tifa was about to go batshit insane on his ass for something that he couldn't give two fucks about.

She glared at him, wine-colored eyes narrowed threateningly. "You're in my seat, jackass," she spat, placing one hand on her hip as she brushed her hair out of her face with the other. Who the _**hell **_did she think she was, barging in on the Turk and demanding that he get his sorry ass up and move? Bitch acted like she owned the place! Well, come to think of it she did, but Reno didn't care; he flipped Tifa the bird, leaving his bowl on the table before walking away _just _to piss her off. "Yeah, fuck you too."

"Bitch," he muttered as he stalked off, stopping to lean against the doorframe into the living room, or as Reno likes to call it the 'Bitch Zone', as everyone and their fucking brother enjoys ragging on him in it. God, he was sick of these people, but without 'em he had no place to live, and no place to live meant no food, and no food meant an unhappy Reno; when Reno was unhappy, _everyone _was unhappy. He found himself being attacked facially once more. "The fuck, yo?"

He found himself face to face with, yes, once again, Yuffie Kisaragi. Goddamn, would she just leave him alone already? She said nothing, instead pointing above Reno's head just like she had the previous night. Lo and behold, fucking mistletoe. The goddamn bane of the Turk's existence at the moment.

Christmas morning couldn't have arrived sooner for Reno. He had been hoping to get a new EMR, a new suit, a promotion, hell, even socks; anything to let him know that people give two shits about him. It's not like he wasn't deserving of gifts, considering he actually went out of his fucking way to get anybody anything: he had gotten Cloud a new motorcycle (since he had totaled his old one), his mom a new couch (since he had ruined the old one), and Axel (his cousin) a new pair of chakrams (since he had broken the others). So yeah, pretty deserving. Oh, and he had a special something for a special someone that he wouldn't give them until the time was right.

Which he decided was when they were busy. Which was right then.

He waltzed up to Yuffie, who was currently playing around with her new shuriken, and stood right in front of her, smirking like a jackass. Pulling something out of his jacket, he leaned down to plant his lips on hers in an innocent kiss, though thanks to Yuffie it quickly turned into something more risqué and spicy: she fisted her hands in his hair, pulling and pulling and pulling but the redhead didn't complain; he was busying himself with running a hand down her back, shoving it into her back pocket before they broke apart. When she looked at him questioningly, he just grinned and showed her what was in his hand.

Mouth gaping at what she saw, Yuffie quickly regained her ability to speak. "Mistletoe," she breathed, looking back up at Reno with a smile on her face before drawing him into another kiss, this one more passionate and less desperate. She pushed him into a wall, never once breaking the kiss, and continued their earlier activities. As both began feeling lightheaded and breathless, they broke apart; both were flushed considerably and grinningly like dumbasses as they both thought the same thing.

_Best Christmas __**ever**__. _


	10. Why do you love me?

"One beer, please." I raised my head at the familiar voice; I was honest-to-goodness shocked to see Yuffie at a bar, let alone mine. She looked, dare I say, depressed, as if something was wrong and she figured that drowning herself in alcohol would fix it. Heading to the back, I snagged a bottle and came back out, passing it to her as she sat down on a barstool. "Thanks, Tifa." I went back to cleaning my glass, eyes never leaving the young ninja as she drank, ever so often stopping to sigh. "Tifa, can I ask you something?" I nodded, showing her that she had my permission to do so. "Why do I love Reno?"

The rag in my hand ceased its cleaning, and I set the glass down behind the counter. "That's a strange question, sweetie," I said comfortingly, stroking her hand compassionately. "Why, did he break your heart?" She shook her head. "Did he do something stupid?" Another shake of the head. "Did he ask you to marry him?" Yet another shake of the head. I was getting nowhere fast, so I decided to not ask any more questions and just let her tell me.

"I just…wanted to know," she said quietly, looking at the drink in her hand. "I thought, maybe you would have a reason for me, y'know?" She laughed dryly, shaking her head in denial. "Man, I sound really stupid right now, huh? I can't help it, though; I feel like a need a reason as to why I love him."

"Sweetie, you don't need a reason to do anything," I stated, not bothering to hide the concern in my voice. "As for your little problem…hmm, how do I put this…?" She looked up at me with hopeful eyes, and I could swear there were small twinkles of hope embedded in her brown orbs. "If you feel like you need a reason, then I s'pose you didn't come to me of all people on coincidence. If you want my advice, I'll give it to you: make it simpler."

Her pretty face twisted up in confusion, head cocked to the right as she stared at me. "Simpler?" she asked, eyebrows furrowed in thought. "What do you mean by simpler?"

"I mean, don't try so hard to come up with a reason for loving him," I replied, going back to cleaning glasses. "Think of simpler reasons, ones that are glaringly obvious but oh so easily overlooked, and more reasons will present themselves." I watched as her face lit up with joy, an epiphany of sorts, and she tossed a five dollar bill on the counter before heading out the door as she thanked me over and over again, telling me to expect her back later with the Turk, a date of sorts.

A few hours later Yuffie was back as promised, this time with a lanky redhead in tow. I laughed quietly at how Reno was obviously strong and capable, yet still let himself be dragged around by his girlfriend. They sat down at a table, chatting animatedly with each other (though it seemed like Yuffie was doing most of the talking). I poured a glass of Coke for the cute blonde boy standing in front of the counter, watching the pair out of the corner of my eye and listening intently.

"A…reason?" I heard Reno ask, genuinely curious. "Okay, I'll play along; why do you love me, yo?"

I heard Yuffie giggle, seeing her twist her hands together in her lap and noting her calm expression. I nearly held my breath, eager to hear the young ninja's reason for her unconditional love towards the Turk. "Because I do."

Smiling, I finished pouring the soda for the boy and handed it to him, exchanging it for a ten dollar bill. When I reached into the register to pull out his change, he gave me a small smile and told me to keep it. His generosity impressed me, as did the fact that he took a seat at the bar and began talking to me, not as though I were an adult, but as though I was his friend. I faked no emotions as we talked, honestly enjoying the teenager's company; talking to him reminded me of Cloud when he was younger, so full of energy and happy all the time. We talked for a while, until he realized the time and hastily apologized and said goodbye, saying he had to go because he was late for something, though for what I didn't catch. I bid him goodbye as well, focusing my attention back onto Yuffie and Reno, who had moved to sit in the same booth, wrapped up in each other and paying the rest of the universe no mind.

They really were made for each other.


	11. Everything's alright

The raven beauty took extra care to follow the redhead wherever he went, making full use of her ninja skills so as to not be caught and anger him. She followed him to bars, work, stores, home, even on vacation; she wanted him, but didn't think she could have him due to their…_differing _walks of life. He was a Turk, and she the resistance against them, leading to conflicting emotions in the poor girl's heart and mind. Should she act on her feelings towards the male, or should she continue stalking him, never straying close enough to be acknowledged?

_'I s'pose I'll just keep following him,'_ she decided, crouched behind a leafy bush as she gazed upon the boy's lanky figure, outlined by the orange hue of the setting sun. She always took great precautions to not be seen, hiding in bushes, alleyways, even in plain sight a handful of times. _'No need to confuse him with my feelings. He's probably got too much to worry about as it is, let alone some stupid sixteen-year-old with a little playground crush on him.'_

Whenever she spotted him, she found herself unconsciously fixing herself, pulling her shorts down and her shirt up a smidge, trying to impress him though she wouldn't go up to him and talk to him. As much as she wanted to deny it, she'd fallen in _love _with the older boy, cursing herself when she found her thoughts drifting to being in his arms, being his object of affection and many other not-so-innocent musings as well. She was discovering it to be harder and harder to stop thinking about him as the months passed and, for the sake of her own sanity, she decided to ask a friend for help.

'Teef, I need help,' she had confessed to Tifa, knowing in advance that the twenty-year-old bartender could give her at least some help. She explained her predicament to the older girl, flushing considerably throughout the entire explanation of her feelings towards a certain redheaded Turk. 'I really like someone, but I don't know how to tell him 'cause I'm afraid that he won't return my feelings. What should I do?'

'Find the right time,' Tifa told her, taking one of Yuffie's hands in both of her own, 'and tell him. But, I can't tell you when that should be, you have to figure it out yourself, sweetie. I'm sure when the time is right, he'll realize he probably likes you just as much as you like him.' She offered the ninja a small, motherly smile, drawing her into a hug and pressing a familial-style kiss to her temple. Taking her advice straight to heart, Yuffie resolved to wait it out and see when exactly the perfect time was to tell Reno her feelings. So she did, waiting a total of two long years.

At the tender age of eighteen, barely legal and armed with a new body and a fresh outlook on life, Yuffie set out to capture Reno's heart and make him hers. She had waited so long to figure out where his alliance lied, and after he had dropped the Midgar plate two years previous she was heartbroken before realizing he had dragged his heels to let people evacuate; now, one hundred and four weeks later, she was thoroughly convinced he was on the side of justice, and planned to make her move.

She headed up to a cliff, the very cliff that she had watched Reno visit every day for the past two years she had been following him. Hiding behind a tree until he came, she kissed a bit of her pride goodbye as she stepped out from her hidey-hole and walked toward him. 'Hey,' she greeted him quietly, catching his attention almost right away as he turned around, hand twitching near his EMR until he realized that she was not a threat. 'I thought I might find you here. I wanted to talk to you. I'm—'

'Yuffie Kisaragi,' Reno finished her sentence, turning back towards the setting sun as he shifted his weight and shoved his hands in his pockets. Feeling her confusion, he added: 'I read your file. You're from Wutai, you're eighteen, you're an accomplished ninja, and your weapon is a boomerang style shuriken. Plus, you've been stalking me for the last two years.'

Yuffie's eyes widened, chocolate orbs growing in disbelief. 'H-How did you know?'

'You're a mouth-breather,' he responded with a chuckle and a smirk as he turned back around to face her once again. 'For a ninja, you're pretty damn _loud_, yo. But I think it's cute,' he admitted, stepping closer to her and using one hand to raise her chin higher to his face, leaning in close to whisper into her ear. 'I know why you've been following me, too.'

Yelping in the back of her throat as he pulled back, her face was suddenly masked in many different shades of red as she averted her gaze to Reno's shoes. 'Really?' she squeaked, too embarrassed to make eye contact with the man who still had his finger under her girlish chin.

'Mm hm,' he answered, moving even closer to where their noses were almost touching. Yuffie felt all of her previous self-confidence and bravery pack up and scram, leaving her blushing and helpless with the man of her dreams. Reno leaned in closer, touching his forehead to the younger girl's, giving a small smile as he closed his eyes delicately. 'So…I don't think you'll mind much if I do this…'

Her breath hitched in her throat as he pressed his lips to hers, the touch feather-light and giving her the ability to pull away at any time. Instead of breaking the kiss, she fisted her hands in his hair and pulled him down further as she pressed back, sighing through her nostrils. After she was aware that Reno knew she wasn't leaving, she relocated her arms to wrap around his neck; Reno, in turn, wrapped one arm around her waist as his other hand traced her jaw softly.

They broke apart a moment later, mouths still brushing one another. 'Promise,' Yuffie panted, voice breathy and low, but still holding the youthful tone if always had, 'to love me truly…' She took in a deep breath before continuing, eyes still closed and still pressed up against Reno: '…and I'll be yours.'

'Did, do, and always will, babe,' Reno breathed, brushing a few strands of hair out of Yuffie's face and tucking them behind her ear. His touch lingered as he lightly maneuvered his fingers down her cheek, earning him a fluttery sigh from the teenager. 'So long as you'll have me, that is.'

'Of course.'

These were the last words exchanged between the pair before they reunited, the second kiss being undoubtedly more passionate and lengthy than the first. Becoming lost in each other, neither noticed a certain dark-haired bartender leaned against a tree trunk and grinning knowingly. Looking up to the sky, Tifa breathed deeply and closed her eyes. 'You see, everything's…alright.'

Somewhere in the Lifestream, an emerald-eyed brunette beamed.


	12. Dead frogs

The first time Yuffie and Reno met was in a high school, on a very sunny Wednesday, at about six forty-five in the morning. Yuffie, at the supple age of nineteen, was, starting three weeks previous at the beginning of the new school year, the student teacher for the biology lab during first, third, fourth, and fifth period, and as such it was her job to collect the materials the students needed for class. This, of course, led to her speed-walking down the hallway with a tub of dead frogs that reeked of formaldehyde as she hurried to get to the classroom on time, and preferably before the kids.

"Shit!" she repeated, as if on a broken record, trying to speed up her pace only to run into another person, sending the tub crashing to floor and spewing dead frogs everywhere, including all over Yuffie's exposed legs (she cursed herself for wearing short-shorts). "Aw, fuck!" She began re-bucketing the small and slimy corpses, cursing under her breath, but paused as she noted that there was an extra pair of hands among the carnage. Looking up, her eyes fell upon a handsome redhead working to recollect the frogs, his long ponytail draped over his shoulder until he flipped it behind him.

"Sorry 'bout that, yo," he apologized, dropping a couple of frogs into the bucket as he smiled at her, his freckles standing out well against his pale skin. "I should really watch where I'm goin' next time." Yuffie only offered a small, nervous smile; she really wished she had been born with the gift of small talk. In retrospect, she decided, even if she was able to converse with the Samaritan, she'd get too lost in his melodic voice. "Hey, I don't think I've seen ya here before. Name's Reno, n' I'm the English teacher for Core A. I'd offer ta shake your hand, but mine seem ta be coated in frog juices."

Yuffie giggled, causing Reno to laugh as well, and the two of them were soon lost in their laughing fit. "I'm Yuffie," she offered after they had calmed down enough to speak coherently to the other. "I'm the student teacher for Core A's biology class, but I don't think I've met you either." She picked up another frog, squeezing its middle mindlessly with her thumb and first two fingers before depositing it into the bucket to reunite with its brethren. Grabbing yet another frog, she used her frog-filled hand to point at Reno, suddenly coming to a realization. "I remember they said that the English teacher was out for the first three weeks 'cause he was on vacation. You don't really seem like an English teacher to me, personally."

Reno grinned, taking the frog out of Yuffie's hand and holding it unfeasibly close for comfort to his chest, putting on a dramatic, sappy look. "But soft!" he began, "what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun…" At this he had pulled the poor frog away, gazing upon it with mock affection before Yuffie snatched it back from him, unable to fight the smile working its way onto her face. After she dropped that frog back into the bucket, she reached out to grab the last one, only to have her hand brush Reno's.

There was no spark of heat, no moment where everything made sense after gazing into each others' eyes, and the world definitely did _not_ come crashing down in a frenzied act of passion. Instead, there was only a boy, a girl, and the sacrificial-in-the-name-of-science body of the poor grass frog they were fighting quite unprofessionally over. That didn't stop Yuffie from leaning in and stealing a kiss from her co-worker, though, nor did it stop Reno from returning it.

It wasn't horribly passionate, it wasn't electrifying, and it wasn't at all romantic, but for the two of them it was perfect.


	13. Hold my hand

Five minutes into the first day of ninth grade math, Yuffie had figured out who the class annoyance was; much to her displeasure, said annoyance's assigned seat was right next to hers. Focusing intently on what the teacher was saying, she found herself being poked repeatedly, and only after the action became too irritating to handle did she turn to her left, ready to tell the boy off.

"The hell do you want?" she whispered fiercely, barely suppressing the need to yell at the top of her lungs. He started babbling, most of his gibberish falling upon deaf ears as Yuffie let out a groan and returned her attention to the math lesson the teacher was going over. That didn't stop Reno, though, and he just kept talking and talking and talking, pushing Yuffie to her next-to-last nerve and forcing her to contain her anger so as to not attract too much attention to herself.

This continued for the full two hour block of math, and Yuffie was ready to just about off herself by the end of it. After she had gathered her stuff and organized it neatly, she sped the hell out of there and over to her locker, swapping out her math materials for her science binder. Taking in a deep breath as she walked into the science room, she quickly had her peaceful and relaxed state broken as she realized that she was once again sitting _right next to Reno._ The events that had transpired during the previous class were almost exactly repeated, including Yuffie's near-suicidal thoughts by the end.

Yuffie was both horrified and a bit peeved when she noticed that she had every single class with Reno, and for some ungodly reason sat next to him in every one. During art, the last class of the day, she couldn't stand it any longer; something had to be done, and fast. Whipping her head to the left, she glared at Reno, causing his speech pattern to break as he stared at her in fear.

She inhaled sharply before speaking, quietly enough to not be heard by the teacher but loud enough to get her point across. "If I let you hold my hand, will you shut the fuck up?" she hissed through her teeth, right hand clenching tightly around the pencil currently pressed against the paper. Reno said nothing, instead grabbing her left hand in his right and returning his gaze to his paper, cheeks tainting a dark red while his pencil scratched nervously across his paper.

Not a word from Reno was spoken in any class again for the entire year.


	14. Only one bed

_Afternoon_

"Would you kindly stop your bitching? I'm not any happier about the sleeping arrangements, yo, and you don't see me pissing and moaning," Reno said through gritted teeth as he turned to Yuffie, pulling his room key out of his pocket before turning back to face the door, inserting his key and opening the door. As soon as both he and Yuffie were inside the room, Reno closed the door and faced the young ninja once again, his back to the room. "I don't like you, you don't like me, so let's just agree to disagree and get the fuck on with the vacation, capiche?"

"Um, Reno?" Yuffie asked sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck with her right hand as her face was masked by a light shade of red. After a particularly nasty 'what?' from the redhead, the thief directed her gaze at the carpet and continued in a quiet voice. "Th-there's only one bed," she pointed out, causing Reno to turn around and see that she was correct, resulting in a mirrored blush on his face.

_Evening_

"We're going to go explore a little before we set sail," Tifa informed the group as they exited the dining room, full and satisfied. Receiving an enthusiastic 'okay' from Yuffie and a half-assed 'whatever' from Reno, she grabbed Cloud by the hand and motioned for Denzel and Marlene to follow. "We'll meet you in the theatre for the show! We'll save you both a seat!"

Reno hammered the 'up' button to call the elevator and let out a sigh as he picked a few hairs off his shirt. Not long after, the doors opened and the pair boarded the elevator, Yuffie pushing '11' as she followed the redhead inside. Before the doors closed again, a large group of very tan-skinned people also got on, one of them pushing the button for deck 13. When the elevator stopped at deck 11, Reno opened his mouth to ask the others to move so he could leave but was interrupted by Yuffie.

"Dispénsenos, pero esto es nuestra plataforma. ¿Por favor movimiento aparte para que podamos bajarnos de?" Yuffie asked, tapping one man on the shoulder politely. He smiled kindly and complied, addressing his companions and telling them what Yuffie had asked. Grabbing Reno by his wrist, she dragged him out of the elevator in a bewildered state, calling out "Gracias, señor. ¡Disfrute del resto de sus vacaciones!" as she exited.

The redhead stared incredulously at the lithe Wutain girl until he regained the ability to speak. "What the _hell _was that?" he demanded, more shocked than angry. "I didn't know you spoke fluent Spanish!" he added after assessing the confused look on the young girl's face.

"There's a lot you don't know about me," Yuffie replied, realization dawning on her face as she processed what she had just said. _What the fuck, Yuffie, _she thought to herself, mentally kicking herself in the balls she didn't have. _That sounded like a damn innuendo!_ "I mean, it's not like you spend a lot of time around me, right?" _Nice save._

_Nighttime_

"Sorry I was kind of a bitch to you earlier," Yuffie apologized as she watched Reno strip his pants off, giggling softly at his pink boxers. "I just really didn't like the idea of rooming with you, that's all," she continued as she watched her roommate finish undressing. "You sleep in your boxers?"

"You sleep in your skivvies?" Reno retorted smartly, motioning to the eighteen-year-old's current attire: a black bra and matching undies. At this, Yuffie pouted childishly, causing Reno to smirk in victory as he tossed his dirty clothes into his luggage. "Which side do you sleep on, babe, right or left?"

"Right."

"Convenient, yo. I sleep on the left." Reno eyed her as they both slipped into the bed, trying to keep as much distance between each other as possible without falling off. While the two were getting comfortable, Reno's thoughts were on a single track.

_I'm in bed with a girl. I'm in bed with a girl I don't particularly like. I'm in bed with a girl I don't particularly like who also happens to be a ninja. I'm in bed with a girl I don't particularly like who also happens to be a ninja so if I piss her off I might wake up missing my wallet, all my boxers, and my left testicle. Joy._

His thoughts of the many ways that Yuffie could mangle him and leave him for dead were interrupted by the very person that haunted his subconscious. "Reno?" she asked quietly, getting a 'hm' in reply. "I'm…kinda cold. Is it okay if I…?" she trailed off, face heating as she pondered what she would have said, were it not for Reno's innate abilities to decipher subtleties. He placed his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to his body, sharing his heat with Yuffie. "Thanks," she mumbled into his neck, the warmth causing her to feel euphoric.

"No problem," Reno answered, readjusting his arm to hold his bedmate tighter before finally drifting off to sleep, face buried in the top of Yuffie's head.

_Morning_

Reno awoke to the sweet sound of singing and the smell of bacon and eggs. Sitting up groggily, he rubbed his eyes and looked at the table; lo and behold, breakfast. Once he got out of bed, he made his way over to the food, situated outside the bathroom door, and as he moved closer to the bathroom the singing became more distinct.

_"Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world,_

_She took the midnight train goin' anywhere_

_Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit,_

_He took the midnight train goin' anywhere…"_

Reno ate his breakfast as he waited for Yuffie to finish with the bathroom, breathing a sigh of relief when she exited, the towel she had wrapped around herself slowly slipping down. The redhead decided he'd better get in the shower before something _embarrassing _happened. He quickly thanked her for ordering room service as he shut the door and locked it.

Yuffie just shrugged and began getting dressed.

* * *

The days passed, one after the other, and before anyone knew it the last day had arrived, and the ship was docking in its last port of call: St. Croix. After seven days of sleeping together, neither Reno nor Yuffie felt awkward or uncomfortable. In fact, for the past few days, both climbed into bed without a second thought, Reno automatically slinging an arm around Yuffie's shoulders as she habitually huddled close to him.

Outside of the bedroom was a different story entirely. Reno tried his damnedest to avoid any kind of physical contact with the young brunette while Yuffie did the same. It was because of this that when Reno told Yuffie on the last day to meet him in the pool at midnight, the butterflies in her stomach decided to drop H-bombs.

Yuffie arrived at the destination a few minutes before midnight, seating herself along the edge of the pool as she pulled her hair into two nub-like pigtails. Before she could react, Reno came running by, making a large splash when he jumped in. "Reno!" she shrieked, kicking her legs playfully.

"Get in!" he encouraged, leaning one elbow on the wall next to Yuffie. She shook her head, grinning mischievously as she continued kicking her legs. Reno, having none of this, grabbed her by the ankles and pulled her in, despite her screeching protests.

"Augh! Look what you did!" Yuffie complained, rubbing at her eyes. "You ruined my makeup!"

Indeed he did, and while mascara ran down her face and her eyelids were smeared messily with shadow he had only one thing to say: "You're still beautiful, yo."

Yuffie's brown, brown eyes widened in surprise. "Wh-what?"

"I said you're still beautiful," Reno repeated, brushing Yuffie's wet bangs out of her eyes and behind her ears. As he pulled his hand away his fingertips lingered, ghosting down her neck before leaving and causing her to shiver. "Can I?"

She didn't understand. Why wasn't she embarrassed? Why wasn't she screaming at him about being in her personal space? Why did she let him touch her like that, and why didn't it feel _wrong_? Why did she want to feel his hands on her, why did she want to be around him? Why didn't she feel deep rooted hate when she looked into his beautifully expressive eyes?

Why did she want him to kiss her?

Her only response was a slow nod, signaling to Reno that yes, he had her permission. What came next was the briefest touch of lips, no more than two or three seconds, not long at all but why was she breathless? While staring confusedly, it hit her. "You feel it too," she whispered, bringing a hand to the back of his neck and pulling him down into a sweet, chaste kiss a few seconds longer than the first.

"Would you like to go get a cup of tea?" he asked, getting out of the water before grabbing Yuffie's hand to help her out.

She gave a small smile and nodded. "Yeah. I'd like that."


	15. Don't stop believin'

She was just a small town girl, all alone in the world.

He was just a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit.

Both wanted to find love, but neither had ever been successful.

How convenient that both had run into each other at the train station, taking the same train scheduled to leave at midnight.

They soon found out they were staying in the same 'room' for the trip.

'My name is Yuffie,' she told him, extending a hand in greeting, which he took almost immediately.

'I'm Reno,' he replied, letting go of her hand, almost reluctantly.

Over the course of their time on the train, the two had begun talking to one another, finding out more and more with every passing minute. Reno eventually gained the courage to act, and on a whim, grabbing her hand in his and intertwining their fingers.

Yuffie showed no desire to break the contact.

This story reminds us all that no matter what, everyone can find love, regardless of their backgrounds. Whether you're a girl from a small town, a boy from the city, or neither, there's someone out there for you.

When it comes to finding them, just remember:

Don't stop believing.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Gah, I love Journey, and I love Reno/Yuffie, so I figured what the hell, why not put em together?

Enjoy the fluff, my pretties.


	16. Driving Lesson

"Once more from the top, then we can finish for the day," Tifa offered, flipping her waist-length hair behind her shoulder and readjusting her tanktop. "You're doing a great job, but the only problem is that you're not giving Glinda's character enough bitchiness. It's imperative that she's a despicable bitch at this point in the play, and if you want to keep the part, you've got to put out the right personality."

Yuffie bit her lip, running a manicured hand through her short black hair nervously as she nodded in agreement with "Elphaba," Tifa's character. "Okay, I'll try to really get in character this time." Tifa smiled and pushed a button on the CD player by her right hand, cueing Yuffie to begin. _"What is this feeling, so sudden, and new?"_

_"I felt the moment I laid eyes on you," _Tifa sang.

_"My pulse is rushing."_

_"My head is reeling."_

_"My face is flushing."_

_"What is this feeling? Fervid as a flame, does it have a name?" _both continued together, Yuffie's voice noticeably higher than Tifa's. _"Yes…Loathing! Unadulterated loathing!"_

_"For your face," _Yuffie complained, giving off vibes of utter disgust.

_"Your voice." _Tifa returned the same feelings of hatred.

_"Your clothing," _the young thief started, but had to stop because of a sneeze. "Crap! Damn sneezes!" she swore, looking up at her friend expecting to see her angry, but was surprised to find her laughing. "Sorry about that, Teef. Should we start over?"

"Nah, I think you've got Glinda down now," the shapely brunette giggled, standing up and offering a hand to Yuffie, who immediately grabbed it and accepted the help. "Do you need a ride home?" Yuffie nodded and followed Tifa to her car.

* * *

"Reno!"

"Whathafuck?" Reno gasped, clutching his chest after dropping his can of soda on the kitchen floor. Turning around, he saw that the intruder was none other than Yuffie "Stickyfingers" Kisaragi, his next-door neighbor and closest friend. "What the fucking hell are you doing here and how the hell did you get in?" he asked as he was assaulted with a hug around the neck, quickly returning it before prying the sixteen-year-old off of him.

"I'm here to ask a favor and I got in using a paperclip and a pocketknife," Yuffie explained, brushing her bangs out of her eyes. "Yes, you heard me correctly. A paperclip and a pocketknife. In my defense, I've picked locks with less before. Don't underestimate my abilities, Turk."

"Right," Reno replied nervously. "So what is this favor you speak of, oh wise and talented Great Ninja Yuffie? And does it involve me being bodily injured in any way? 'Cause if it does, yo, then the answer is 'fuck no.' Capiche?" He grabbed a glass from the cabinet and picked up his unopened soda can from the floor, pouring it into the glass after filling it with ice. "Well?"

"Can you teach me how to drive?" Yuffie asked enthusiastically.

Reno dropped his glass on the floor, shattering it as he stood frozen in shock. "What?"

"Can _you _teach _me _how to _drive_?" she repeated slowly, emphasizing her question by miming out _you, me, _and _drive._

"I heard you the first time!" Reno flailed his arms in frustration, his face slowly growing red with exertion. "I'm not deaf, dammit! I'm just kinda shocked because you just fucking asked me to teach you how to drive! That's not something normal friends just ask each other as if it's just idle conversation! 'Hey, you see the game last night?' 'Yeah, it was pretty awesome. By the way, can you teach me how to drive?' Seriously!"

"Well, normal friends aren't seven years apart," Yuffie stated matter-of-factly. "It's you, Cloud, or my parents. Cloud doesn't really like me, and I'd probably kill my parents if they had to teach me how to drive. So that leaves you, and I thought you'd be a good friend and help me out, but it looks like I was wrong." With angry tears in her eyes, she stormed out of the room, slamming the front door as she left.

"Babe, wait!" the redhead called out, but she was already gone. "Fuck. Way to go, dipshit. You might've just lost your only true friend over something stupid." Reno walked into his backyard, jumped the fence and landed in the Kisaragi's yard. He grabbed a handful of pebbles and started chucking them, one by one, at Yuffie's bedroom window.

Yuffie came to the window and opened it, glaring daggers at the twenty-three-year-old as she crossed her arms across her small chest. "What?" she spat venomously, a tiny voice in the back of her mind telling her that she shouldn't be so snippy. "I don't wanna talk to you."

"Then just listen, alright?" Reno answered, his tone apologetic. "Look, I'm sorry about what I said earlier, okay? I shouldn't have been so harsh, and I really hope you can forgive me and we can still be friends, because I do appreciate your company, yo. So whadda ya say? Friends?" He received no answer and looked back up at her window to find that Yuffie was gone and her light was out. "Kisaragi?"

"Of course I forgive you," Yuffie said softly, latching onto his waist in a tight hug. "You're my best friend, Reno. I couldn't hate you forever. And I respect your decision to not teach me how to drive. It's your choice, after all. I'll just go to a driving class."

"I didn't say I wouldn't teach you." Yuffie looked up at him, hope sparkling in her brown eyes. "We'll start first thing tomorrow."

* * *

"I really appreciate you helping me out, Reno," Yuffie thanked him as she slid into the driver's seat of her '69 Volkswagen Beetle parked in the driveway. She looked around the inside of the car and bit her bottom lip. "Um, Reno? You do know how to drive shift, right?"

"No, of course not," Reno replied sarcastically, rolling his slate eyes in mock annoyance. "That's why I offered to teach you how to drive in a manual transmission car. Yes. That makes perfect sense." He clicked his seatbelt and turned to face her. "Yes, I can drive a shift stick, thankyouverymuch. Do you at least know how to start the car and take it out of park?"

Yuffie nodded and did so, turning to Reno afterwards to find out the next step. "I don't know what to do now, though." She placed her right hand on the stick shift, doing nothing with it because she didn't know what to do. Reno placed his left hand over hers and easily maneuvered it into the proper gear, telling her to hit the gas gently to drive down the driveway into the street. "I did it!"

"Now, hit the right turn signal and turn," Reno supplied, reaching over her to push the turn signal up, causing a small arrow pointing right to light up on the dashboard, but Yuffie didn't notice. She was too busy blushing from the physical contact that had happened during the last five minutes to even care. "Keep your hands at ten and two, and turn gently. You don't need to turn the wheel very far to turn, yo." She did as she was told, and smoothly turned onto the next street, continuing the same thing until she was on the highway.

"This isn't too hard," Yuffie chirped, Reno's hand still over hers on the gear shift, periodically changing gears. "I know I said this a lot, but thanks so much for helping me out. You're the best friend a girl could ever wish to have."

"Yuffie, you're going too fast."

"My foot's not even pushing that hard on the gas," she replied confusedly, taking her foot off the accelerator to find that it did not come up. "Reno! The gas is stuck! What do I do? Do I slam on the brakes?"

"No!" Reno commanded, yelling to get through her frantic cries for help. "Slam on the accelerator!"

Yuffie's eyes bugged out. "Are you fucking crazy?"

"Trust me, will ya?"

"Fine, but if we die it's your fault!"

"JUST SLAM. THE FUCKING. ACCELERATOR."

Yuffie slammed her foot down on the gas pedal, unsticking it from the floorboards. "R-Reno! You were right! How'd you know?"

Reno shrugged and tightened his grip on Yuffie's shifting hand to try and stop the shaking. "Driver's Ed. Now c'mon, take the off ramp right here and then it's only an hour or so to someplace I wanna show you."

Soon enough, the pair arrived at a cliff overlooking the entire city. Yuffie parked the car (with Reno's assistance, of course) and exited, sitting at the edge of the ledge next to Reno. "It's so beautiful up here," Yuffie pointed out, eyes roaming over the bright lights of the city below.

"Yeah," Reno agreed, unconsciously leaning closer to Yuffie.

She turned to face him. "Reno?" she asked quietly, their faces close enough for her to count the redhead's freckles. Yuffie began leaning in as well, closer and closer until…their noses hit. For a moment, both just stared at each other before cracking up laughing, still close to one another's faces.

"Care to try again?" Reno suggested, intertwining their fingers.

"Of course."


	17. Innuendo

"Wow," Yuffie gasped, panting heavily and laying her head on Reno's shoulder as the redhead wrapped his arm around her waist. "That was exhilarating."

"Damn right," Reno agreed, trailing his fingers down her side, making Yuffie sigh in contentment (or as much of a sigh as possible while trying to catch her breath). Burying his face into the top of her head, he added "I didn't know you could go so…_fast, _yo."

Yuffie smirked, kissing the redhead's neck gently. "Mmm, and I didn't know you could keep up so well," she mused, playing with her boyfriend's fingers. "You certainly surprised me, which leads me to think maybe we should try again sometime. Maybe we can go further and faster, eh?"

The bed creaked as Reno shifted into a more comfortable position. "Prob'ly not anytime too soon, babe." He winced. "I'm sore as all hell, and there ain't no way I'll be able to move like that for at least a week. You wore me out." He began placing light kisses down the side of her jaw. "But I promise, as soon as I stop hurting, I'm all yours, yo. We can go further, faster, work harder, anything you want."

Before he could say another word, Yuffie cut him off with a not-so-chaste kiss, an invitation which he happily accepted. "I wanna do it again _now,_" she whispered after the kiss broke. "How about we make a small little bet? Loser sleeps on the couch for a week."

"Alright, my conditions are no shortcuts and no cheating," Reno offered, looking up at the lithe, athletic beauty on top of him. Yuffie seemed to ponder this for a moment before smiling down at the sweating redhead.

"Deal. I hope you look forward to sleeping on the couch, _sweetheart._"

"Oh yeah? What makes you so sure you'll win?"

"I was on my high school track team," Yuffie replied as she led Reno out the door. "The chances of you outrunning me are lower than the chances of Cloud smiling."

"We'll see about that, yo."

* * *

**Author's Note: **I know what you all were thinking.

Pervs. XD


	18. Womanizer

**Superstar, where you from? How's it going?  
I know you got a clue what you're doing  
You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here  
But I know what you are, what you are, baby**

He makes me sick. Walking around, girls falling all over him, not able to see what he really is. He's not perfect. He's been told that. He just doesn't give a fuck. So every chick in here, new or not, will fall victim to his charming ploys. Idiots.

I sit here nearly every night, sipping my Diet Coke and watching him, just watching, watching him win over another sucker. I haven't fallen for him, though. I know what he is; I'm immune. Believe me, he's tried, time and time again, but I told him I wouldn't fall for him, and why.

**Look at you gettin' more than just a re-up**  
**Baby, you got all the puppets with their strings up**  
**Fakin' like a good one but I call 'em like I see 'em**  
**I know what you are, what you are, baby**

They're like puppets, performing for their puppet master. All he has to do is flash that shit-eating smile and they turn to putty in his over-experienced hands. He's like a predator: seeking out the weak ones and overpowering them to bend to his will.

"Hey babe," he said one night, leaning against the bar next to me, "wanna dance?"

I snorted in disgust, turning to face him and crossing my arms over my chest. "You're a great faker, but I call 'em like I see 'em, _babe_," I spat, "and I know what you are."

**Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer**  
**Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer baby**  
**You, you-you are, you, you-you are**  
**Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer**  
**(Womanizer)**

"You're a womanizer," I snarled venomously, and he seemed undeterred from my accusation. "You treat women like prizes, always having the most, and it makes you feel powerful that no one can figure it out, doesn't it?"

**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**  
**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**

"You're mistaken, yo," he replied, shifting closer to me.

I chose not to move. "Don't try to front, Reno. I know just what you are, and you'll never be able to fool me into being just another notch in the belt. So fuck off."

**(You!)**  
**You got me goin'**  
**(You!)**  
**You're oh so charmin'**  
**(You!)**  
**But I can't do it**  
**(You!)**  
**You womanizer**

He tried everything in his power to get me goin' every time he saw me at the club. I admit, he was very charming, but I knew I couldn't get roped in by this lecher's suave nature. As per usual, he continued his 'valiant' efforts to hop into my pants, but I kept 'em buttoned, zipped, and belted.

**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**  
**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**

Just about every night seemed like the same old song and dance. He'd make a move or two, I'd shoot him down in flames, and he'd continue to deny the accusations. Asshole. As much as I put him down, he just came back up like a spring, never stopping what he was doing, even when cursed out by me.

**(You!)**  
**You say I'm crazy**  
**(You!)**  
**I got your crazy**  
**(You!)**  
**You're nothing but a**  
**(You!)**  
**Womanizer**

"You're crazy," he told me once, smirking that smirk that makes the girls swoon.

"I've got your crazy," I growled back, hand clenched tightly around my glass. "And you're nothing but a useless womanizer, so in the last year of talking to me, you haven't changed a bit. Not that I'm surprised."

**Daddy-O, you got the swagger of a champion**  
**Too bad for you, you just can't find the right companion**  
**I guess when you have one too many, makes it hard, it could be easy**  
**Who you are, that's just who you are, baby**

"That hurt, yo." He placed his hand on his chest in mock pain.

"No it doesn't, you heartless bastard," I scoffed, "because you couldn't care less about anything that's not about you. You can't even find the right girl, but I guess when you have so many it makes it hard to find her. It could be easy, but that's just not who you are, is it?"

**Lollipop, must mistake me you're the sucker**  
**To think that I would be a victim not another**  
**Say it, play it how you want it**  
**But no way I'm never gonna fall for you, never you, baby**

"And through everything you do, you're the only true sucker, thinking that I would fall for you like everyone else. Well, play your cards how you want, but I'm never going to fall for you, Reno. Get over it and stop going after me," I stated, taking another sip of my Coke.

**Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer**  
**Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer baby**  
**You, you-you are, you, you-you are**  
**Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer**  
**(Womanizer)**

The look on his face told me enough about his inner battle to keep me going. "I'd never fall for a sexist bastard like you; I'd rather die before that happened. Find some other victim tonight, because I'm not gonna be her. So you might as well just take Yuffie Kisaragi off your list, asshole." I finished my drink and stood up, walking to the karaoke stage and grabbing the mike.

**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**  
**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**

"This song's for someone here in the club," I announced into the microphone. "You know who you are," I added, looking straight at Reno with a blank expression on my face, but he understood what I meant.

**(You!)**  
**You got me goin'**  
**(You!)**  
**You're oh so charmin'**  
**(You!)**  
**But I can't do it**  
**(You!)**  
**You womanizer**

The song started. _"Superstar, where you from? How's it going?/I know you got a clue what you're doing," _I sang, watching Reno raise an eyebrow at me. The song went on, and when I got to the chorus I sang with all my heart and a year's worth of pent-up feelings.

_"Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer/Oh, womanizer, oh you're a womanizer baby/You, you-you are, you, you-you are/Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer, womanizer."_

**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**  
**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**

A few nights later, he was back once again, determined to make me a number, the fucker. The script was the same; flirting, followed by accusations, he'd deny them, then I'd walk away. It pissed me off to no end that he couldn't take a goddamn hint and leave me the fuck alone.

**(You!)**  
**You say I'm crazy**  
**(You!)**  
**I got your crazy**  
**(You!)**  
**You're nothing but a**  
**(You!)**  
**Womanizer**

Two weeks later, I'm still crazy and he's still an arrogant, lecherous bastard with no conscious.

**Maybe if we both lived in a different world, yeah**  
**(Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer, womanizer)**  
**It would be all good and maybe I could be your girl**  
**But I can't, 'cause we don't, you!**

"Maybe if we lived in a different world," I finally said, "everything would be sunshine-and-lollipops and I could be your girl. But we don't, so I can't, so get the _fuck_ over it and go bother someone else who actually wants to talk to you out of another emotion other than anger and hatred."

**Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer**  
**Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer baby**  
**You, you-you are, you, you-you are**  
**Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer**  
**(Womanizer)**

"Give me a call when you've changed, Reno," I said calmly, leaving money on the bar to pay for my drinks. "I'll be waiting."

**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**  
**Boy don't try to front**  
**I-I know just-just what you are are-are**

Three years later, I got a call on my cell phone from an unknown number. Cautiously, I answered it and put the phone to my ear. "Hello?" I asked into the phone, eager to find out who was calling. "May I ask who this is?"

"It's been three years since I've seen you last, yo, and I've decided to take your words to heart." The first thought in my head was _what the hell, who is this?_ "What's the matter, don't remember me, _babe_?"

My eyes widened.

**Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer**  
**Oh, womanizer, oh, you're a womanizer baby**

"Reno?"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Okay, I had to cut some of the song out for length reasons, and because I didn't need the extra lyrics in the story.

Womanizer is by Britney Spears.


	19. Game Over

I limped along, my only stability provided by Yuffie, the young girl wrapping an arm around my waist and allowing me to lean on her as we hobbled onward, keenly looking for any more trouble on our path, unwilling to fight any longer. We'd had enough; you can only get beat up so much before you say fuck this, enough is enough, assholes, now go away. I winced as I strained my shoulder, feeling the discomfort of the bullet lodged in my limb and wanting nothing more than to just keel over and die right then, but I couldn't. I just couldn't. That's not what Turks did, Turks fought 'til the death, plus on top of the fact that I had another person with me, and I couldn't leave Kisaragi alone, she'd die if I did. Besides, we were a team, y'know, one for all and all for one; no man left behind, never risking someone else's skin to save your own.

Stickyfingers rubbed my side as I cried out in agony, not even bothering to mask the unmanly tears running down my face. "Don't worry, Reno, it'll all be better soon," she reassured me, "trust me. I'll make sure you get the proper treatment and I'll make sure you live. Don't worry." She pressed a light kiss to my temple before adding, "I don't know if this is such a good time, but I think I love you."

"Funny," I answered through clenched teeth, trying oh so hard to stop the tears, "I was about to say the same thing, yo." She kissed my head again and we continued on, but not long after I began shivering. What the hell, it's not like it was cold out. Was I really losing that much blood that my body temperature was dropping? Shit, what a horrible way to die. "Unnnngghh…" I moaned as I no longer felt my feet on the ground, instead finding myself in Kisaragi's arms, held tightly to her chest; I curled up in pain as she picked up her pace, jogging toward the small town not too far ahead. Damn, she was pretty strong for someone who looked like they couldn't bench a Moogle. "Yu…ff…"

"Shh," she whispered, slowing down to a brisk walk and placing her index finger on my dried, chapped lips before replacing it with her own mouth; I didn't have the strength to walk, let alone press back into the kiss. It was over almost as quickly as it began, and I leaned into her touch as she stroked my cheek, thumb tracing over the twin scars I had underneath my eyes. "Don't talk, it wastes energy. Just sleep, I'll get you to the town doctor right away." Once in the town, she reverted to the best way to find the doctor in any town: yelling out for him. "Help, help! My friend is dying and I need to find the local doctor! Help!"

Some amount of time later, I found myself on what felt to be a table, a bright-ass light shining overhead as I heard two distinct voices, one belonging to Yuffie while I failed to recognize the other. "I'm going to have to pull the bullet out, ma'am, and I'm sorry to say that we don't have time to pump him full of drugs first. It will hurt," the unknown voice explained, and logic told me it was the doctor in charge of saving my pathetic life.

"You're sure that after you extract the bullet and patch him up, he'll be okay?" That's my girl, always worried about others more than herself; she could get cut in half but as long as the others are okay, all is well.

"Positive." Suddenly, a hand was touching my face tenderly and another set of hands was at my shoulder, poking, prodding, moving, adjusting. It hurt like fucking _hell_, but the softness on my face was soothing and helped distract me from the pain a little. Before I knew it, my shoulder felt numb and wetness fell on me from above; I could only guess that Jailbait was crying in joy.

"Reno?" she asked, running a hand through my blood crusted hair and kissing my dirty forehead. "Reno, how do you feel?" She continued to thread through my hair, which was probably an entire new shade of red by now, while I attempted to find my voice.

"F…f…" I started, sitting up with Kisaragi's help and holding my now-patched shoulder. "F…f…_fuck, _that hurt…" She laughed, a short, sweet sound, and kissed me again; this time, I at least made an attempt to return it. I made a mental note that if we made it out of the war alive, I'd propose to her. We'd get married, have kids, and live a long and fulfilling life.

Outside the town, we met up with Cloud and Elena, both of them considerably bloody and beat up. The doctor was able to cure my broken leg with a potion, so I was at least able to walk on my own again. My shoulder still hurt like hell, but I was alive. We peered over the hill obstructing the view, and were horrified at the scene laid out in the valley; bodies of both sides were strewn everywhere, and the brave few resistance members still fighting were not looking to be winning the battle. We rushed into the valley, guns drawn, shooting every soldier from the opposing side that we could. Cloud and Elena took the left side while Stickyfingers and I took the right. In total, the battle was about 25 against 200, but we were trained to never give up. The entire war was proof that people from different backgrounds and worlds could come together and fight for a common cause; 'Lena and I were both Turks, but different generations; Cloud was a SOLDIER, and though he should have been fighting with them he chose to join our infantry squad; Yuffie was just a teen from Wutai skilled in battle tactics and defense strategies. We'd had others, but they were either killed, wounded, or MIA; Cloud took Aerith's death especially hard, and 'Lena was absolutely torn over the loss of Tseng.

My heart may have been pounding like fucking mad, but it stopped as soon as I turned my head to see how Yuffie was doing. "Yuffie!" I screamed as I dashed toward her, jumping in front of her just as an enemy soldier fired his weapon. The bullet hit me square in the back, and Yuffie cried out in horror before firing her gun at the enemy and killing him instantly.

"Reno!" she yelled, dropping to her knees and cradling me close, burying her face into my hair and crying, tears falling like an unstoppable rainstorm. "Reno…"

"'S okay, Yuf'," I slurred, feeling a blackness creeping up onto my consciousness. "You're 'kay, tha's all tha' matters." I drew a shaky breath. "Love you…" I breathed as I gave in to the darkness and let it swallow me as my whole world went pitch black.

_'Game Over, would you like to try again? Yes/No'_ the screen proclaimed, and I sighed in exasperation as I looked down at my lap to see a smiling teenager looking back at me with deep brown eyes. "You suck at this game, Reno," she giggled, and I leaned down to peck her quickly on the lips. "Even I lived longer than you."

"Exactly," I replied, shifting so I was lying down and she was on top of me. "Thus proving I'm too old for you, babe, accept it." She flicked my nose playfully before getting off me and standing up. "Although it seems to me that you don't care. Could this be true?"

"Perhaps…" she answered, walking towards the stairs before stopping and turning back to look at me. "I'm gonna take a shower, wanna come with?" she offered, waggling her eyebrows suggestively as I turned over onto my stomach and smirked at her.

"Meow," I purred as I followed her up the stairs and into the bathroom.


End file.
